Monday, 25 October 2010

Slapgate: The Aftermath

It's rare nowadays for Gym Ninja to be able to train on a Sunday morning due to a regular PT booking, however this week her client was away, leaving Gym Ninja the opportunity to work out early and hit the Sunday Spin Class too. Perhaps 'hit' is not quite the best choice of words to use, but you get the idea.

Once in the Changing Rooms, Gym Ninja was again faced with one of her pet hates. 
Listen people. 
Gym Lockers are all uniquely numbered. The way to remember where your stuff is, is to remember the number of the locker. NO NEED for a grown adult to do this...

Obviously there were oddballs at the gym today, as on route exiting the changing rooms, Gym Ninja passed this.....

Yes, someone had brought JAM into the gym. 
Gym Jam!

Gym Ninja had plenty of time today, partly thanks to getting up earlier to watch the Korean Grand Prix (that then went bland due to excessive rain), so she had plenty of time to warm up before going into the Spin Studio.   On the new 'old' bike that Gym Ninja had to select yesterday due to re-arrangement of the room, was sat a woman with noodles for hair. She was really really tall, yet had not changed the seat and handlebar heigh settings since Gym Ninja had used it the day before, so looked a bit like a circus entertainer (the type who pedal on teeny tiny bikes). All knees and elbows. Oh and noodles for hair. Gym Ninja took another bike. This one felt weird too. Pfft!

With Noodles talking loudly to her circus companion, Gym Ninja quaffed her can of 'emergency energy' & warmed up as the room started to get full. Oooh, lots of different faces in a Sunday session. Today Gym Ninja appeared to be the newbie. 

"It's cold isn't it?" Said Noodles to her friend.
"I should have brought a scarf!"

Stupid Noodles! If you WILL insist on taking up the bike right under the aircon vent (which is EXACTLY why Gym Ninja sits there) then you may have to expect some sort of wind chill for goodness sake!  Gym Ninja then tried to turn away, as the aircon was blowing Noodles hair into semi-straight strands before they pinged back into tight curls again. How terribly distracting.....

The class got underway. Spin CLIMB today. Lots of moments where you put the resistance up so high and you briefly pause and then can't start again.  At one point, The Instructor got off her bike and paraded around the room again, shouting encouragement.

"I'm NOT going near you!" She smiled. 
Fine! Saves Gym Ninja slapping her again.

"Did you know, SHE slapped me yesterday?" Shouted the Instructor to the room full of strangers.  The strangers gawped at Gym Ninja whilst they pedalled hard up their imaginary hill. 

Lovin the drama, the Spin Instructor continued, warming to her theme of abuse.

"Yep, she slapped me RIGHT across the face, just here!" At that, The instructor pointed to her left cheek. The strangers gasped, theatrically.

"It left a BIG red mark AND I fell onto the floor!" She continued, smirking at Gym Ninja.

Oh cheers great! Now everyone in the room thought Gym Ninja was violent. Noodles leaned further away from Gym Ninja at this last fact. To be fair, that was a good thing, as it meant less risk of being poked in the eye with a stray curl.

Post Spin, Gym Ninja headed to the weights section. Legs. Now Gym Ninja's legs had been exhausted after an hour of spin climb, but a girl has to do what a girl has to do to keep her bum from being anything other than solid!   Hammer Strength Leg Press, Hack Squat, Straight Legged Deadlifts and also some Farmers Walks. OK, so Gym Ninja is no farmer, Let us just call them heavy dumbbell walking lunges ok? 

Now the walking lunges were to be done on the running/walking track that circles inside the gym. However just as Gym Ninja stood ready to begin, she was overtaken by a group of muppets on boingy springs. Aka The Kangoo Class! 

Boing boing boing boing they ran, around the track. GO BACK INTO THE AEROBICS STUDIO!
STOP being stupid in public! Uhh! How can Gym Ninja lunge when there are people bouncing all around her? 

So Gym Ninja grumpily (there's a surprise) picked up her dumbbells and sloped off to another part of the gym so she could properly fry her legs. Once this had been successfully achieved, Gym Ninja braved the spiral staircase to the changing rooms with legs that behaved like soggy string, showered, filled up on Promax protein and then left....  


The Gym Jam was STILL there........