Wednesday, 16 June 2010

Gym'll fix it.....


Gym Ninja has been stuck on a mood trough all day! Goddamit mood, why so low? After all, a big decision was made yesterday about the future. Surely that should result in excitement and happiness?

Blatantly not! The 'meh' mood was here to stay. Not helped by a visit to the Nasty Place to do what needed to be done. Sign on. Pah!

Gym Ninja had made the error of wearing a dress that immediately went transparent in sunlight (what IS it with dresses like that? You check at all available light sources and they are fine. You walk outside? BAM! Naked!). Not the best outfit to sit amongst the lost souls of the Job Centre really. Plus it didn't help that the staff were determined to ruin Gym Ninja's mood further.

JC Man: "So have you got your info on what you've done to look for work?"

Gym Ninja nodded and handed the man four A4 pages of information.
He looked back at Gym Ninja, a panicked look in his eye.

"We only get 4 minutes for each person. I can't look through all of that!"

Then what IS the point?

The man then informed Gym Ninja that on her next 'visit' she had to attend a ritual mass humiliation where she is to attend a one hour 'how to look for a job' patronising session with other tormented souls.  Great. Splendid! Looking forward to that already....

So, taking the Meh mood with her, and doubling it to a feeling of despair courtesy of the Nasty Place, Gym Ninja dragged herself out of the building and homeward, to finish writing a new client programme.  Luckily this cheered Gym Ninja up somewhat as it is always very exciting when someone is ready to take the plunge and begin a new healthy regime. Knowing they are due to see exciting changes ahead is very motivating.  However, once the programme was sent, the Meh mood descended once again.


There was no other thing for it. Time to sweat the Meh out of her.

People. If all else fails, if you have a Meh Mood...if no one else can help, and if you can find them, then maybe you can hire....


Obviously not.

Gym Ninja meant sweating it out in the gym. Gym'll fix it doncha know! So off GN went, hoping that this beast of a mood would shift!

Once parked up, Gym Ninja made it half way towards the main doors and realised she couldn't find her membership card.
Back to the car.
Handbag emptied all over the car seat. No card.
Purse emptied over seat (to be fair, that didn't take long). No card.
Gym Bag emptied over seat. No card.
Purse checked again. Card!
Why did it disappear first time round?

Once inside, Gym Ninja's nostrils were hit by the smell of fresh toast. Fantastic! Just what's needed to fuel a workout. Good job Meh mood is here to act as a catalyst to exercise...

Do you know what? The Meh Mood really DID push the workout a level up from usual. Gym Ninja flew along that treadmill today. As she ran like the wind (kind of), she could not help but notice an abundance of herrruge men working out. Big thick arms, chests like barrels, heads disappearing into shoulders (what HAPPENS to their necks?)....looks like there is a new 'Roid Dealer in the place! These guys seem to have doubled in size in a matter of hours! Admittedly now it is sunny then guys tend to double their efforts, doing extra cardio to drop body fat and get cut to show of their bodies. But these guys were just blocky, huge and about a DD cup to boot....

In the main gym area, Gym Ninja threw her generic sweat towel on the floor as she adjusted a weight stack. Next to GN's towel was a similar one belonging to another member. Their towel, identical, was in pristine condition. Inky black, all fluffy and plush. Gym Ninja looked at her own sweat towel. Faded black ,bobbly and almost bald. Hmm, time for a new one perhaps? Great. Just as the meh mood seemed a distant memory it was being replaced by sweat towel envy....

In the gym today was Policewoman girl. Knee bends, rapid, about 78 without stopping. Feet turned out. Not low enough to be a squat. Not anything really other than a comedy distraction. This was rapidly followed by double quick side bends aka Elastic band bends. Do not twang and break Policewoman girl!

On the cross trainer was Bobble Head. Are you aware of those American Bobble Head dolls?  Their heads wobble furiously as they move?

Well that was exactly what was happening with this girl. Gym Ninja was now concerned that the head of the girl may ping off altogether!

Oh and Ballerina Girl was also in. She who 'points' one foot in front of her other as she performs Overhead Triceps Extensions or Biceps Curls.

Once in the changing rooms, Gym Ninja could hear some tinny iPod tunes blasting out of a nearby woman's headphones.  Wow. Turn it down lady! Eventually, it quietened down....then went all echoey. How odd?
Gym Ninja turned around and the woman had moved...she was now in the toilet cubicle, hence the quieter echoey music.  Great. Just switch it off for a moment!!!!

Now that the Meh Mood had dissipated and the Maximuscle Promax Shake quaffed, Gym Ninja was safe to head home.

Talking of Maximuscle, they are doing offers on some stuff again if you want to check it out and save some spondoolies?

Ok so if you or your guy buys Cyclone then you have a 'Buy One get one Half Price' offer if you click here

Then for you bar addicts, they are offering a '3 for 2' on ALL of their bars if you click here..

Nom nom!

Think the offers expire by the end of June so go take a peek and see if it saves you a fair bit of wonga.

See you back here tomorrow now that 'normal service' has been resumed..

Gym Ninja