Tuesday, 20 April 2010

The Muppet Show


Work again!
Monday morning loomed large after another night of broken sleep (broken sleep is usually caused by dread of work). To make matters worse, Gym Ninja had the 'pleasure' of the company of her newly promoted line manager (aka Muppet) with her.  However, not to worry as Gym Ninja also scheduled in an evening job interview at a gym for a Personal Trainer role. Focus Gym Ninja, focus!

Off Gym Ninja went, and drove to the agreed meeting spot that GN and Muppet were doing a presentation to a board of  NHS staff. 2 minutes from the venue was a McDonalds.
As Gym Ninja pulled over to make some calls, Muppet pulled up in his car and got out. His shirt covered beer belly loomed in view at GN's car window.

"Shall we go to McDonalds to talk through what we're going to do?" Suggested Muppet?
How did Gym Ninja know he was going to suggest that eh?

To cut a long story short, the day turned out to be rather entertaining for all the wrong reasons. Muppet is clumsy and many a time Gym Ninja had to spin round and conceal laughter when he dropped notepads, stumbled over chairs, and at one point snagged his briefcase strap around a bollard that pinged him backwards (as he walked towards a client) like a gigantic rubber band.

Once 'released' from his company at the end of the day, Gym Ninja headed for the gym, via Holland & Barratt as GN had run out of her favourite protein bars (currently the Promax Diet Bars) . Oooh, FANTASTIC! They had a 15% off promotion running for this week, so GN stocked up!  This then left just enough time to do a weights workout session for legs before scooting off and attending a 7pm interview at a local health club chain. A few days ago, Gym Ninja had scheduled in a 7pm slot with the Gym Manager regarding a possible freelance role as a Personal Trainer at their club remember...

Wow, as GN pulled up at the gym the car park was packed. Near the front of the building were a number of cars circling trying to find a nearby parking  space. People, THINK about where you are? You are wasting time being lazy driving around the car park to find a space by the door...to go INTO THE GYM. Why not just park at the end and walk? You're there to work remember? *tisk*

Once in the Gym, GN had work to do. Today she began with Clock Squats...or lunges at many different angles as if your legs were the hands of a clock. Not to be confused with Cock Squats which most likely just point straight up & then flop down again ;-)

Mixing things up, GN then did barbell squats, then some incline Leg Press work. Tottering back to the free weights, she had just enough time to finish off the brief yet effective workout with one legged dumbbell deadlifts. Yep-you can FEEL the core workig hard to stabilise you as you stand on one leg, and deadlift the dumbbells, the working leg wobbling all over the place. You don't need to go too heavy on this-a lighter weight will suffice as your body is working hard to stabilise you and working one leg at a time (the other leg out behind you as you bend) makes for a tough session. Try them!

A stretching out of the muscles and one quick change later & Gym Ninja was off, heading towards the other gym chain for her 7pm interview. Being a tad early meant that Gym Ninja had to spend some time mooching in Sports Direct, the discounted gym clothing store. In reality it gave GN a chance to see if there were any cheap bits she may be able to wear for a fitness photo shoot she's planning. Sure enough, for the princely sum of £2.49 Gym Ninja got some red Lonsdale hand wraps (always seemingly essential for photoshots!), plus some grey marl shorts for £3.99. Bargains!

By 6.45pm Gym Ninja was parked up outside the gym she was having the interview at. In she went....

The Receptionist was behind the counter reading a letter. To her right was a sweaty gym person waiting patiently to get the attention of her. Gym Ninja stood directly ahead, also waiting.  The receptionist continued to read the letter. No looking up. No acknowledgement. Nope. Just the actions of the world's slowest reader.  After a few minutes, the receptionist looked up and served the sweaty gym member. She then turned to GN..

"May I help?" She asked.

"Yes, I'm here to see Eddie" (and for the sake of privacy the name has now been changed) Replied Gym Ninja.

The receptionist appeared puzzled.

"I've not seen Eddie today and I've been in since 2pm. Have you got an appointment with him?"

Gym Ninja nodded. "Yeh, at 7pm. About Personal Training?".

The receptionist frowned, told GN to take a seat then said she'd go and ask another staff member if they had seen Eddie.  5 minutes later she returned, mobile phone in hand.

"Have you  definitely booked in with Eddie for the Personal Training? I'm just trying to ring him now" She explained.


"No, I'm not booked in for Personal Training...I AM a Personal Trainer. I'm here about a job?" Gym Ninja was a tad annoyed by now. Where is Eddie?

"Hmm, his mobile is off. Leave it with me. I'm gonna see what I can find out" And with that, off she went leaving Gym Ninja marginally annoyed by Eddie's lack of time keeping!

10 minutes later and Gym Ninja is now suitably annoyed and ready to leave, but the receptionist is nowhere in sight. Gym Ninja approached the desk where a male staff member was standing.

"I'm supposedly here to meet with Eddie" Explained Gym Ninja "However the receptionist says he's not in and I can't see where she went now" 

The staff memmber looked confused, before pointing eagerly behind GN like a pantomime. "She's behind you!" He shouted. Sure enough she was.

"Er, sorry about this..." Said the receptionist in a rather embarrassed fashion, screwing her face up, "But I still can't reach Eddie so I rang the other Gym Manager and she said...er.... Eddie took the day off today to wait in for a fridge to be delivered". The receptionist stared at Gym Ninja. Gym Ninja stared at the receptionist.


"So, Eddie took the day off, despite arranging an interview with me to 'wait for a fridge to be delivered?'" Repeated Gym Ninja, trying to conceal the incredulous tone in her voice.

WHAT?????  Stood up in favour of a fridge? Seriously?

The receptionist promised to ask Eddie to call GN when he returned into work, and with that off stomped GN. No WAY would GN return. There are many rumours of how badly that chain of gyms treat their PTs anyway. This just about sums them up!

So now it is 25 hours later and still no call from Eddie...Gym Ninja does hope his chilled items haven't melted by now......

Toodle pip
Gym Ninja x