Saturday, 6 February 2010

My eyes, My eyes...!


Gym Ninja is blogging quickly as she has much coursework to be doing this evening, but didn't want to leave all you Ninjarettes in limbo without a blog.

So, today, being a Saturday, meant that it was a Saturday Slaughter Session at the gym.  Woohooo! Schedules meant that GN has not been able to train as often as usual, so she's been averaging 3 sessions a week as opposed to 4 as her standard regime. Off she pootled in the new baby, the Mini Cooper!

Having warmed up on the treadmill, Gym Ninja grabbed her things and headed upstairs to the Spin Studio where she'd been partaking in the usual hour of Extreme Spin on a Saturday morning. As she walked past a bank of treadmills, she heard an odd noise...
*bu dumph, bu dumph, bu dumph....*
Turns out the woman running on the treadmill appears to have a gait issue. Not sure if she is aware she runs with a limp but you could hear the foot pattern clearly on the treadmill.

Brrrrr, the Spin Studio was brass monkeys today. Excellent, as there's nothing worse than over heating the moment you start to work up a bit of a sweat. T'was the good guy who was taking the session again. He likes to start at 10am on the dot so latecomers do not shave off valuable 'sweatage' time for the rest of us. we all went...a combination of hills, standing & seated, interspersed by sprints all set to the kind of music that motivates you to work harder!

The hour flew by, and once it was finished, Gym Ninja headed down to the treadmills again to finish off with a quick 10 minute run to cool down. As GN walked past the end treadmill she noticed Pinky, an acquaintance of hers who she occasionally sees at the gym & chats to. Pinky was busy doing a sweaty uphill speed walk, so Gym Ninja went over to say hi and....


DEEP HEAT!!!!!!!!!! Oh, and not only that, but it was coming from Pinky! What to do? No use trying to save the lining of her own nasal passages now by walking away as she'd already acknowledged Pinky and had engaged in conversation. So with much eye watering and choking, Gym Ninja caught up on some gossip and potentially has a future client for when she 'goes live'. (that's assuming Pinky ends her addiction to Deep Heat of course!)

Soon it was time to move onto the weights, with the upper body workout pencilled in, rather tentatively. Gym Ninja hasn't trained upper body for a whole week due to the shoulder injury she sustained through Power Work with the medicine ball. Today Gym Ninja would have to take it easy, keep the weights fairly light and listen to her body. It can be frustrating taking time until an injury heals, but there is no point rushing in, as if you do then you can often delay the recovery or even make it worse!

The womens section of the gym was newly carpeted in women lying on their backs on exercise mats. Hmm. Not much ab work  going on here! Must be the overwhelming stench of DEEP HEAT that was by now, permeating through the entire health club that had knocked them all out like chloroform?  God, Gym Ninja will be glad when the Newbies finally outgrow their new hobby and the sales of DEEP HEAT drop!!!

So, with an easy yet tentative upper body workout boxed off, Gym Ninja headed to the showers. She located the only shower cubicle that is near enough a light panel to be illuminated inside (terribly dark the shower area is!), and pumped the icky basic shower button to 'pump through' some water, in a 'Third World Blue Peter Fund Raising style Water Pumps for Africa' type of a way. On went the shampoo.....oh no! Gym Ninja forgot, she'd recently been scalped, so now she'd OD'd on the shampoo and had a foamy afro that would take FOREVER to rinse out with the pump shower. Grrr!

After 46 days of rinsing off her Afro (it was surely now March?) she went to her locker, passing a woman who was busy shredding dead hair out of her hairbrush and casting it onto the floor, in big fluffy dead hairballs that rolled across the changing room floor like the tumbleweed on a Western. Uhhr! Other people and their dirty habits. Would it have taken THAT much effort for her to do that over the bin? Someone's gonna end up with that stuck on their foot! Yuk!

She gathered her stuff and headed towards a bench, only to be totally caught unawares by a naked pudgy woman who was sat on the aforementioned bench slathering on bodylotion. In the split second that Gym Ninja noticed the woman, she (the woman, NOT GN)  suddenly opened her legs scissor style, displaying a rather overgrown 'country garden effect' of a bikini line (or not so much line, than Vegetable patch) that nearly made Gym Ninja regurgitate her post workout Protein Shake!!!

Gym Ninja HATED the changing rooms today. She nearly went blind.........


Gym Ninja x