Saturday, 26 December 2009

Boxing (is a great workout) Day

No no no, Gym Ninja did NOT go boxing today, although she would maybe have leapt at the chance if someone had offered?

No-Gym Ninja had decided on Christmas Day, having successfully binged on chocolate and felt truly horrid as a result, that she would go running outside on Boxing Day Morning.   Of course, this would happen the moment she had gotten up....oh and eaten breakfast as GN finds it tough to train without food in her stomach....ah, well, she also needed to wait until after she'd perused the online sales know, get a few bargains?   After all, she'd picked up some bargains online from M&S at 1 minute past midnight Christmas Day, plus got a few bits including new trainers, online at 1am today from JJB Sport...may as well carry on looking?

But Gym Ninja does not procrastinate (much) about exercise, so once her stomach had digested her breakfast, she was warming up with some dynamic stretches, ready to head out, with her woolly hat, 'onto da streets! INNIT!'

Ahem. Sorry. Gym Ninja went all ghetto fabulous just then! Must have been the woolly hat. Gym Ninja prefers caps but so far has yet to find a decent one.  So, with her hat pulled down low, and her iPod plugged in, she was ready to pound the pavements....or actually, quite possibly the promenade if she were brave enough to run the gauntlet of kids on new bikes????? Hell yeh, she was!!!!!!

So off she**dy hell, it was cold today!!!! Now an upside of running when it is cold, is that Gym Ninja finds it far easier. Less chance of over-heating and then turning into a snail (as in pace, not actual snail transformation).   Run run run run run she went, heading down towards the promenade. Would it be, as she feared, packed full of people waddling along in couples, or kids razzing up and down on their new bikes, or people out walking their dogs? Maybe the prom would be full of gym freaks like GN, who cannot bear not exercising and so head out as soon as it is possible...?

She turned the corner and......oh. Bliss! The prom was so quiet today. Yes, there were the rare sightings of waddling couples so bundled up in layers of clothing they were as broad as they were tall. Yes, a few bikes did razz past Gym Ninja as she ran, however these were adults on bikes, not kids. Maybe kids don't get bikes nowadays? Maybe they are all at home on the Wii with their virtual bike game?

Gym Ninja headed right...and ran into the cutting icy breeze and the strong sunlight. Retina burn plus wind burn = "I've had better days". ... but she continued....onwards, run run run, looking out over the river and then skidding on seaweed so NOT looking out over the river-staring at the pavement instead....

Gym Ninja eventually turned around and headed back homeward bound. Not because she was tired...strangely she felt energized (most likely due to the huge amount of Christmas Day carbs stashed away in her) so could have carried on. But she now feared for the health of her nose that was slowly freezing to death. As she turned around, she could now see fellow promanadees (or whatever they are called) dog walking, cycling, strolling thanks to her retinas now regaining their powers due to the sun being behind her.   She ran past little dogs like foot stools on legs,  a greyhound (sans rabbit)  that was strolling, a big shaggy flump of a dog with just a nose and no eyes....all being walked and all ignoring Gym Ninja thank God. Until what????? What dog saw Gym Ninja and thought,
'Hey, she looks like a good game..'?

Yep. The boxer dog. The YOUNG boxer dog with springs in its feet.

BOING BOING BOING BOING goes the dog, his nose bumping Gym Ninja's elbow as she tried to run.
Go away Boxer dog. Gym Ninja scowled at the dog who was busy wiping dog snot on her sleeve.
She looked up and shot the dog's owner a 'please restrain your dog as I am trying to run here' type of look. The owner was, however, walking directly towards the sun so had no use of retinas.  Her look was wasted!
BOING BOING BOING BOING goes the dog, as Gym Ninja then runs in a spazzy way only someone with a dog attached to her elbow can do.
Next minute...'clink'
The dog's eyes flicked from ''hahhahahahahahahahahahaha I am a bit loopy' to 'I will kill you by ripping your throat out'.
Gym Ninja knew that the woolly hat made her look like a burglar and now she would be recreating a 'stop thief' type storyboard for the police.  Help!!!!!

Luckily, just as the dog was ready to rip her throat out, his owner called him over and Gym Ninja was left to run away...a tad faster than she had been running, until she was safely out of harms way...

Just as Gym Ninja rounded the corner of the road that took her home, she had a sudden swerve and was back on the promenade again.  Why? Because coming round the corner was an odd looking man in a military camouflage jacket and hat.
Hmmm, now Gym Ninja may be over-cautious, but she is certain that men in outfits like this are the ones shown in fuzzy 'we think this may be the murderer' type videos shown on Crimewatch!  GN was NOT taking any chances.

The detour meant that her 30 minute run now became a 40 minute run, so in fact the camouflaged man had in a way helped her today. Excellent!  Oh and with one day left (today) of eating badly....and by that she means more custard, a knock-off After Eight and 3 Quality Street Caramels, Gym Ninja cannot wait for tomorrow when she will attempt a skipping rope type circuit followed by weights at home.

Gym Ninja does not LIKE eating like a Muggle. Her head hurts, her energy levels have dropped through the floor and she cannot keep her eyes open. All of that courtesy of the chocolates and custard! She had forgotten now sluggish food like that makes her.  BAD Muggle food!

Until tomorrow

Gym Ninja xx


Would you rather only be allowed to eat the pale blue coconut Quality Street chocolates OR only be allowed to eat the pink fudge Quality Street?