Monday, 3 May 2010

Bank Holiday Ninja

Good news!

The Nutella Pixie is dead! Gym Ninja spent 3 hours yesterday sat in the same building as a jar of Nutella & none passed her lips! Oh and 2 hours today. See? Cured thanks to the Guilt Pixie (who reminded Gym Ninja that with an arse like hers there would be no more Nutella for the foreseeable future!)

OK, so Bank Holiday today. Wooohoooooooooo! Another Muppet-free day.  Now Gym Ninja had a few plans. Off to Lidl, to track down some cheap yet highly effective (apparently) face serum, followed by a trip to the gym. But first GN had to run the gauntlet of the disapproving neighbour who was out in the front garden (that is linked to GN's front garden). She'd already pointed out Gym Ninja's dandelion invasion once...GN couldn't face another lecture!

The moment the neighbour went into her house, GN sneaked out of hers and drove off. YAY! Success!

Now, GN had deliberately not painted her fingernails today so she would 'fit in' at the no frills Lidl store. Well, GN 'says' fit in, however she'd  never quite fit in. Anyway, the point was, GN wanted this serum that is supposedly better than the magical Boots serum. In she went...what a silent store?  No music or noise whatsoever. An odd assortment of food and drink was piled into shapes either side of the aisles. Well, whilst she was here GN decided to go mooch at the fruit and veg section, but only managed to track down organic bananas. Everything else was radioactive (as in non-organic).

Annoyingly there was no serum, but they did have the magical face cream so GN picked up the Day Cream and Night Cream at £1.99 per jar (!) and will report back on how good it is in 3 weeks when she is looking 10 years younger......

Once at the gym, a 10 minute run was squeezed out and then it was time for a couple of lower body exercises. Lunges onto a step, followed by Romanian deadlifts. Despite the car park being rammed, the gym was surprisingly quiet? Maybe everyone was in the pool or the Hydropool  (aka Pervpool)? Once quads, glues and hams were worked then it was back to another 10 minute run. Time to mix things up you see.....the body isn't used to splitting cardio into 10 minute bursts! Then, back to the weights, Wide stance pliĆ© squats with some weight plates, then off to the leg press.

The leg press was loaded with 4 x 25kg plates either side, so GN started to strip off two of them as she only wanted 2 plates either side to begin with. As she did so, a rather large muscular guy popped up (not literally! That'd be saved for a blog entry all of it's own!!!!!!) and started to strip off the plates from the other side in an act of chivalry to help Gym Ninja. OMG, how nice was that?  Oh and how nice to help Gym Ninja too ...;-)

Gym Ninja did 4 sets of 10 for the leg press today, noticing the man with the chicken legs on the next leg press was pressing one third of what GN was. That is exactly WHY you have chicken legs Mr!

Some ab work and variations on deadlifts plus leg extension (may a well burn those quads right off eh?) finished the session, and so Gym Ninja went to the changing rooms to get showered and dressed.

Great! Gym Ninja thought her gym bag was smaller than usual. She'd packed her jeans and underwear but no top and no shoes. Not exactly the ideal look is it? So that meant GN had to head home to shower, and sloped off supping on her Choc Mint Promax as she did so......

That afternoon, after a flurry of weeding (ahh the guilt!) GN decided she wanted to be a farmer! Yep. Grow her own veg! So, calling her Mum and coercing her into a trip to B&Q, they both mooched around the vegetable growing section........

Gym Ninja selected the following seeds:

Carrots & pumpkins (for the orange section of Gym Ninja's farm)
Turnips & mushrooms (for the white section of Gym Ninja's farm)
and Beetroot (for the beetroot coloured section of Gym Ninja's farm).

She then picked up a  3 meter long cloche (which in normal persons terminology is a big plastic cover in the shape of a tunnel to help speed up the growth and stop pests, aka Gym Ninja's cats, from tramping the produce!) and a bag of ORGANIC (of course) plant food.

At the till, having watched her mum pay for her items (also a cloche & organic plant food but a variety of different seeds) it was Gym Ninja's turn. The sales assistant scanned the items...

*Bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep...*

The sales assistant stopped when she reached the packet of mushroom seeds.

"Have you grown these before?" She asked, a look of suspicion on her face.

Gym Ninja felt panicky! OMG are mushrooms really hard to grow? Do you need a licence for them? AHHHR!

"Er, no", Answered Gym Ninja, a tad wary.

"Oh" Said the sales assistant and then carried on.....bizarre!
Seriously, what was THAT about?

Anyhow, now Gym Ninja is a farmer! Organic home grown veggies in her garden! HOW exciting! Maybe the plant food will make them into those humungous ones you see on TV shaped as rude things?  So far the mushrooms are planted. In a box, covered in damp newspaper (as per instructions) and in the shed! If they haven't sprouted into thousands by the morning GN will be most disappointed! Meanwhile, to save on unnecessary digging, GN has sectioned off an area of grass in the garden with a sheet of plastic bin bag with the wheelie bin on it, hoping that the grass will die off in time for next weekend when she can sow her seeds!!

Watch this space! These things had better grow or Gym Ninja is going to get all stroppy! for a very lean and clean dinner. Not long now until the photos.............!!!!!!!!

See ya!

Farmer Ninja x