Friday 28 May 2010

Gym Ninja & the Mood Hoover

Well, this blog isn't supposed to be a diary in which Gym Ninja can let off steam, and yet today may just be a day that it is....however, firstly a gym update...

After NO gym yesterday (Wednesday by the time Gym Ninja posts this) GN wanted to fit in a cardio and abs session today, ideally in the daytime when she has more energy for cardio.  However for some reason (OK, so the fact she is now in the habit of going to bed in the early hours) she found herself running late AGAIN!  Pah!  Then she realised she also needed to fit in a visit to see her grandfather who'd just been admitted to hospital. Naturally, visiting him was the main priority, so the cardio session would have to be shorter than planned.

So by midday GN had made it to the gym, walked through the turnstile and then..

*wedge*

That familiar 'jammed' sensation that GN had the other day. The old 'your bag is now stuck in the turnstile which in turn now means YOU are stuck in the turnstile' moment. Gym Ninja is always having bag/door jamming issues. Once when working at a Stockbrokers (yeh, get Gym Ninja!) she managed to hold up about 25 people because she'd managed to get her handbag trapped in a revolving door as she tried to pass through...

Once Gym Ninja's naughty bag was stuffed into a locker, the workout could commence. Some LSD today (Long Slow Duration remember, not any dodgy stuff).

Gym Ninja selected a treadmill that was sandwiched between two pensioners on treadmills too. Both were strolling along fairly briskly, which did kind of make it tough for GN to try and launch herself into a run. It can feel easier to run if the 'neighbours' are running. However Gym Ninja loves to see pensioners at the gym. They are bionic pensioners who will lead a very long healthy life (even if they do make GNs run a tad harder).

Opposite the treadmills were two TV sets.
NOOOOOO!
Is someone up there determined to make this a tough session?

LOOSE WOMEN was on.

OMG. Gym Ninja is all for fluffy TV but really? This? At least that Carol 'I have a toyboy and was married to Chris Evans for all of 5 minutes  yet still bleat on about it' wasn't on it!
Gym Ninja ran faster to make the session speed up...then remembered she was basing this session on 'time' and not distance.
Duh! Bimbo Ninja.

Once the run had finished it was over to oooh, let's see, maybe the X Trainer today. Not been on the faffy old X Trainer for a while.  Again followed more torturous cardio thanks to the continuation of LOOSE WOMEN...s'pose it makes a change from the cookery shows that usually distract GN on a Saturday Slaughter Session?

Once all cardio was complete, Gym Ninja went back into the changing rooms and passed a lady sitting on one of the benches in a towel. GN then headed to the far side of the changing area (yeh it's fairly big) ......only to then see the SAME lady in her towel, now sitting in the shower area.
WHAT?
Teleportation?
Tooooooo freaky for Gym Ninja today!

To finish off the brief yet (fingers crossed) effective workout, Gym Ninja headed back into the gym to work on her abs. Russian Twists with a med ball, Roman Chair leg raises, frog crunches, v-up med ball twists....all whilst being distracted by a woman on the Elliptical Trainer who had such an odd motion going that it appeared she was 'raving' on the machine.

*big fish little fish* (as the raving dance goes)

Time to shower!!!!!!

After a hospital visit and other faffy bits & bobs to do, Gym Ninja returned home to a sumptuous dinner of steamed veg & cottage cheese drizzled with Udo's Choice Oil....mmm. FAR nicer than you may think!

Then?


MOOD HOOVER! 

Uh oh!

Are you aware of what a Mood Hoover is people?

Mood Hoover.
(noun)
A person who sucks up all  positivity, happiness, feelings of excitement.

Sometimes they are fairly obvious in what they do. You may be happily making plans about the future, excitedly talking about someone new you've met, maybe even showing them your new car or telling them about a promotion at work?


*wooooooooooooo*
(thats the hoover sound)

"That'll never work."
"He sounds like a player"
"How can you even afford that?"
"I bet you'll never handle the pressure"

And with one sentence your mood comes crashing down. The happiness or excitement you felt vanished! Poof! Into thin air. Then you are left with a vacuum of self doubt, suspicion, worry, stress......
NASTY Mood Hoovers.


But it's bad enough when they are obvious, but when they are more sly? Oooooh, NOT nice.

Sly Mood Hoovers appear to have your best interests at heart. They only tell  you that they are saying this 'for your own good' or 'because you are my friend' or even 'I'd want you to tell me if it were the other way around'....
Of course that is just as dangerous as you may change what you are doing as you think it is helpful advice. You feel sad, slightly empty and fed up. But the Mood Hoover knew you would.

So why do they do it?

Maybe you are on a new fitness regime, or have lost some weight? The Mood Hoover may start to feel jealous of you, or threatened by your new shape and outlook on life? In some cases the Mood Hoover may not even be consciously aware of what they are doing? However this does not help you. Even if you are aware...

Anyhow...why is is GN talking about Mood Hoovers? Who rattled GN's cage?
Obviously a MOOD HOOVER that is who! All wrapped up in a pretty bow of 'helpful advice' came the *wooooooooooooooo* and in fact, it did manage to start sucking out the excitement from GN until she realised what was going on.

Uh oh.

Rather than go too much into detail here (as GN thinks it was a Mood Hoover who was *hopefully* unaware of what she was doing), Gym Ninja will just give a sketchy outline.
Advice was 'given' about a project Gym Ninja is working on.
Gym Ninja used to (!) work in sales so is fully aware of how to sell something, market it etc, and in order to do that one needs to find a USP...a 'Unique Selling Point' that makes what you are selling different to every other thing it 'could' technically be compared with. Then, if it is seen differently for whatever reason (due to the USP) then it makes it harder for the customer to compare directly with competitors. If you cannot be compared then you do not usually have to justify why you are 'better' than them.

Follow so far?

So Gym Ninja has her USP in place for the project. It's glamorous. Aesthetically pleasing and inspirational one would hope. This is possibly a unique and rare slant to the usual way such a service is marketed... but that is Gym Ninja's aim. Cater for the gap in the market which is why she is going down the glam route...however the Mood Hoover disagreed. Thought it was a BAD idea.  Thus followed a few 'veiled' nice vacuuming  comments designed to not only suck away Gym Ninja's positivity and excitement, but also to attack her own sense of character almost.

Yes, GN stepped away from what was happening. Recognised it fairly early (luckily) and after a rant to some friends who assured GN she was doing the 'right' thing & to ignore the Mood Hoover, it was back to trying to block out the comments and focus on the goal.  To help this matter, GN delved into some quotes to refocus her mind...you Ninjarettes may also wish to copy these and hold them for times when you too fall prey to a Mood Hoover?


'You cannot control everything that will happen today. Yet you can completely control the person you will be today'

'Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself'


'Haters are just fascinated by your life'


'All your dreams can come true if you continue believing in yourself. Never stop.'

Plus Gym Ninja's favourite for this very situation...

''Don't let anyone tell you that you have to be a certain way. Be unique. be what you feel"....

That's your lot today Ninjarettes.  Have a fantastic Bank Holiday weekend if you are here in the UK and blog shortly (OK, so probably tomorrow!) ...

Gym Ninja x